I did it! sorry for the sweat stain...thats really gross...
this was actually my 3rd 5k in my life...
and it was so difficult...
first of all, i'm not used to NY weather!! in sunny southern california, if i saw sun outside my window i could get away with jeans and a tshirt or shorts and a sweater...
since i was running, i thought i could get away with shorts and a tshirt...
uh, no...
it was FREEZING!!
i wish i had on warmer clothes...
as i was running, i found it difficult to breathe...
i would run for a minute and then have to stop because it hurt so much...
it literally felt like 10 lbs of bricks lodged in my chest...
and i got so frustrated at not being able to run and then people were walking faster than me...
there were people in
wheelchairs going faster than me...
i got so mad at myself, at them...
i wasn't having fun...
the first time i did a 5k i had such a great time...
i finally understood why people do it...
i could see how addicting it could be...
i'm not striving to be the best runner or be #1...
i'm doing this for me, for my health, for my enjoyment...
but i just couldn't find the joy in it like i had before in the past...
i started wondering if this race was an analogy for my life...
i'm frustrated in my life about the exam and angry and jealous at all my friends who not only passed but are working...
i have a friend who not only got a kick ass job, good pay, benefits, they pay her dues, AND paying tuition...
i have yet to pass and when all is said in done i'll be at least $40,000 to $60,000 in debt...
or maybe i'm just a sucky runner....